eggos | (no subject)

Fraser, Stan, and others had told El the universal truths about Darrow: you come alone, and you can't leave. Eleven is no stranger to being places alone: The lab. The Upside Down. The woods. Hopper's cabin, when he's working. (She doesn't hold that against him, but it's something she recognizes as true.) Darrow's Home for Children is not very different. She's in a room of strangers, but she's still alone. She's strange enough to them that they leave her alone.

Which is how she finds herself now, alone on the floor, her back against her bed. She's got her clothes back, and she's wearing the black-and-yellow top and black jeans now, as she pulls a pillowcase over her eyes to block out the light. There aren't any radios here, not like she's used to, but one of the staff showed her how to use her small, strange phone to make white noise, so she can listen to that, instead. Then she relaxes her shoulders and reaches out.

She tries for Mike, first. She pictures him in her mind's eye, and she focuses, and...

Nothing.

Eleven swallows and tries again. And still nothing. She tries again, until her nose starts to drip sluggishly from the effort, and she sighs and pulls the blindfold off. This isn't working. Which means he's not here, but even if he weren't, shouldn't she have been able to find him anyway? She'd found Kali states away. Why is Darrow any different?

With a breath, she reaches up to wipe her nose. This isn't working, and she's getting frustrated trying. Eleven sighs and tosses the pillowcase back onto the bed as she stands. She'll go for a walk, clear her head. She'll try again later.

The coat she's wearing is too big, still. She has money, but she hasn't gone to buy a new one. Most of the last week has been learning the rules of the Home, and reading up on the things the school will expect from her when she starts going. She's not nervous, except for a little part of her that doesn't know what to expect. She'd only been into the school a few times, in Hawkins, and it hadn't been to learn anything. Stan has been helpful. He's made lists that are easy to read, and if he thinks she's a weirdo, he doesn't say so, or act like it.

She likes Stan. He's a lot like Mike, in the ways that he's nice to her, and calm and patient. There's a tension in him that she's not familiar with, though. He seems always ready — not afraid, not exactly, but not prepared, either. She wants to ask him about it. Maybe she will.

She gets lost in her thoughts like this, frowning to herself and moving from topic to topic as she walks.

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"You'll like her, kid," he says and he believes she will, as long as she gives Beverly a chance. They're a lot alike, having relied on men meant to be their fathers, even if not quite the traditional sense for Eleven, men who only ever ended up hurting them.

"She'll like you, too," he says. "She knows about you. Not everything, not all the secrets, but she knows what you and me mean to each other. That you lived with me back in Hawkins. You two... you got a lot in common. Probably stuff you can talk to each other about that you're not gonna ever wanna tell me."

Eleven hesitates, then reaches for his wrist. If he's from before the dance, then he'll still have it. Slowly, she rolls the cuff of his jacket back, out of the way, so she can see it for herself. In that moment, nothing is more important than learning whether he's still wearing the blue hair band that he'd given to her.

In that moment, El wants to know, for sure, that this other girl hasn't taken her place.

"What- you're lookin' for this?" he asks as she reveals Sara's blue hair band, wrapped around his wrist. He never takes it off. Back in Hawkins, he remembers thinking maybe he'd give it to Eleven, hopefully make her understand just how important she is to him, but he hadn't had the chance before ending up here.

"Yeah, I still got it," he says. "Couldn't lose this."

Eleven looks at it for a long moment, then pulls her own left sleeve up so he can see it.

"We match," she murmurs. It's strange to think about how there are two of this small thing, now. Could there be two Hoppers, too? Could there be two Elevens?

"Huh," Hopper says, looking down at Eleven's wrist. It's the same hair band, there's no doubt in his mind, because he knows he would never forget what it looks like. Sara was everything to him and she always will be.

But he's expanded what everything can mean in these past few years, first with Eleven, then with Beverly.

"Look at that," he agrees in a soft voice. "We match."

"You gave it to me after I closed the gate," she murmurs. She hesitates, but then says, "Do you want it back?" She wants to keep it. It's a link between her and Hopper that she can see, that she can feel. But if he wants it back, even though he already has one, then she'll give it back.

"No," he says, then smiles a little and shakes his head. He curls his fingers over Eleven's wrist, covering the blue hair band with his hand, then squeezes gently. "Nah, kid, that's yours."

He still can't really believe she's here and for a moment Hopper only stares at her, then grins.

"Shit," he says. "Gonna have to make room for you at the apartment."

That earns a small, hopeful smile, and her shoulders start to relax a bit. She's slept in plenty of too-small places before, and she knows that he knows that. If he wants her to sleep on the couch, like he sometimes did, then she will. But he still wants her there. Even with this other girl, even with everything being strange and wrong about when they're both from. He still wants her there.